With the current coronavirus pandemic, Amy Gallagher of Amy Gallagher Coaching believes itโs never been more important to balance your male and female traits โ and explains how…
We all have masculine and feminine energies within us, regardless of our gender. We need these energies to be balanced and united for us to feel whole.
When our masculine energy is in balance, it shows up as the action-taker, the part of us that gets things done in a structured and logical fashion. The typical traits of a balanced masculine energy, sometimes referred to as the sacred masculine, are:
โข Strong and protective
โข Assertive
โข Decisive and direct
โข In touch with feelings
โข Proactive
โข Present
โข Energised and motivated
โข Logical and analytical
โข Outward-focused
โข Structured
โข Directive
โข Driven
Some of these traits will no doubt resonate with you. However, some of you may find yourself running on excessive masculine energy and this is where you start to create an imbalance in how you behave and feel. An excessive masculine energy, otherwise known as the wounded masculine, can show up as:
โข Overly competitive
โข Aggressive and ruthless
โข Ego-led
โข Detached from emotions and unable to be vulnerable
โข Lacking empathy
โข Selfish
โข Headstrong and arrogant
โข Rigid and controlling
โข Pushing and striving when itโs time to rest
โข Only interested in the outcome or end goal
โข Angry and blaming
When I worked in the corporate world, I operated on an excessive masculine energy. I decided early on that I would only be respected and accepted if I acted like โone of the menโ. I believed that success meant I had to be achieving and accomplishing all the time. My โbusy-nessโ spilled over into my personal life. I had a full diary and little down time. I wasnโt tuning in to my feelings and I certainly wasnโt tuning in to my intuition enough. I had suppressed most of my feminine energy and she only came out when I was mentoring and coaching my teams.
Now I believe the whole world is operating on an excessive masculine energy. We have been conditioned to always โdoโ, to be overly focused on achievements.
When do you take time to rest? So many of you complain that you are too busy for self-care or that you feel tired, even exhausted, most days. Our bodies are screaming at us to slow down but we continue to live in this unbalanced way.
We have raised our boys to believe that real men are strong, assertive and unemotional providers. If they dare to deviate from this, they are considered effeminate or weak. And the fall-out from this is a generation of men who are disconnected from their emotions, unable to speak about how they feel and we continue to see an increase in male suicides.
Letโs look at feminine energy now and how this differs from our masculine.
Our feminine energy shows up as the wise one, the nurturer, the truth seeker. Sheโs the part of us that knows when to go inwards to connect to our innate wisdom. She trusts in the flow of life. She knows how to validate from within.
The traits of a balanced feminine energy are:
โข Compassionate
โข Wise and intuitive
โข Connected with nature
โข Empathic
โข Inwards focused
โข Expressive and sensual
โข Flexible
โข Able to multi-task
โข Receptive
โข Magnetic
When your feminine energy is wounded, this can show up as the people-pleaser, the martyr or the victim. Your behaviours are likely to look like this:
โข Needy
โข Co-dependent
โข Low self-esteem
โข Gossiping and judging others
โข Resentful
โข Overly sensitive
โข Unable to express your needs
โข Unable to put yourself first
โข Unable to set clear boundaries
โข Feels too much and also dims her light to โfit inโ with the situation
โข Always saying โsorryโ and struggling to say no
โข Carrying shame and guilt
โข Seeking validation in the outside world
I feel we have been conditioned to reject our feminine nature, our intuition, and been taught to favour our masculine, the energy of doing. If we are constantly in our โdoingโ energy we can never fully connect to our feelings. The simple truth is we need both energies to live from a place of creating and making our visions happen. The feminine part of us is the visionary, the one who can see all possibilities. Our masculine energy is what allows us to make these possibilities become realities.
Itโs interesting to witness what we are all going through right now with the coronavirus pandemic. Mother Earth is demanding us to slow down, to go within, to reconnect with ourselves and to reconnect with each other. She wants us to embrace more of our sacred feminine energy. This is a period of deep healing for all of us and a chance for us to create more balance within ourselves and the world around us.
