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Pressure at work damages our relationships

Employees are embarrassed to talk about their mental health conditions at work

Research out today highlights the immense pressure felt by UK employees to prioritise work ahead of relationships. One in three workers (33%) say their boss thinks work should come before family life, and a third (33%) also say their employer thinks the ideal employee should be available 24 hours a day.

This is according to a new report from Relate and Relationships Scotland, which concludes that overworked employees’ relationships suffer as the build-up of stress at work takes its toll.

The research also found that:

  • 33% of employees say their employer thinks work should be the top priority in their lives.
  • 30% of employees say they feel pressured to work by their manager even when they are ill.
  • 21% of employees say attending to care responsibilities is frowned upon at work.
  • 27% of employees say they work longer hours than they would choose and this is damaging their physical or mental wellbeing.
  • 25% of employees agree that stress at home adversely affects them at work.
  • 43% of employees say they would like their employer to offer relationship support.
  • Relationship counsellors believe work-life balance is the third biggest strain on couple relationships (after affairs and not understanding each other, and ahead of money worries and different sex drives).

Employees struggling to balance work and family are more likely to become ill, perform less well and resign; but those satisfied with work and work-life balance are more likely to perform better and be more productive. The Labour of Love or Love vs Labour report calls for employers to aspire to offer flexible working arrangements as default and to provide free relationship support as part of employee assistance programmes.

Manchester University’s Professor Sir Cary Cooper CBE, President of Relate said: “As this study highlights, work-life balance in this country is shockingly poor and this is hugely damaging for our relationships and overall wellbeing – as well as for productivity. Employers need to take more responsibility for the pressure that stress and lack of work-life balance can put on relationships at home.”

As well as the impact of work pressures on relationships at home, the report also looks at workplace relationships with colleagues and bosses. Worryingly, the study reveals an undercurrent of bullying, with 12% of employees saying that their boss behaves in an intimidating way towards them. But the good news is that 63% of employees say they have a good relationship with their boss and three quarters of employees (75%) reported good relationships with colleagues.

Professor Sir Cary Cooper CBE continued: “It’s reassuring that on the whole people have good relationships with their colleagues. However, given the alarming undercurrent of workplace bullying highlighted by the study, we also suggest employers think carefully about how they can better foster good workplace relationships.”

Labour of Love or Love vs Labour is the first in a series of reports from a major piece of research by Relate and Relationships Scotland. Over 5000 UK adults were surveyed as part of The Way We Are Now study, providing a unique window into the current state of the nation’s relationships.